Remy's Evening
by ElvenMuggle
Summary: Oneshot Remy and Rogue discover the negative affects of alcohol the hard way. Prequel to Remy's Morning.


**Disclaimer: I don't own any of these characters or anything else you recognize. **

**A/N: This is a prequel to Remy's morning. You don't have to read that one first, but it might be more fun if you did :) I doubt anyone is going to read this but it was in my head and I had to get it out anyway. **

**This is another really light M. It's only rated that way because there are two bad cusswords and a lot of drunk people. And I don't think kids should be reading about drunkenness so the rating stays. **

**Thanks for reading and please review!**

…

Tequila. It was a deceptive and strong drink, as found out by most who drink it. It only takes a few shots to get you well intoxicated. You take one, you feel fine, you might even be able to take a few more and still feel ok. But then the ugly affects can hit you in a heartbeat and when you least expect it. One moment you're fine, you're sober. And then the next—you're drunk as a skunk.

At least, this is the conclusion that Rogue's drunken mind had come to. Except that she was drunk, so her thought process went a little more like-

"This shit is baaaad for us," she drunkenly slurred to Remy, who was equally intoxicated. She held up a small shot glass to show him the clear liquid within, swaying slightly from her seat on the floor as she toasted an invisible glass in-between them before downing the shot in one easy gulp.

"Then we should probably stop," Remy nodded, slurring his words together almost as badly as Rogue. "But first," he held up a finger, "we should get some apples."

Rogue slowly blinked as his words took a lot longer than they normally should to sink into her mind. She blinked once, twice, three times before leaning over the coffee table towards him. She opened her mouth as if she were going to say something—but then closed it—only to open it again. Then she seemed to forget whatever it was that she had wanted to say in the first place and snapped her mouth closed and fell backwards back onto her bottom again.

They both sat on the floor on either side of Jean's coffee table, drinking much more than they should have been. Rouge wondered vaguely why they were at Jean's house, but at the moment all she could think about was purple lampshades. She thought about asking Jean why she didn't have any purple lampshades around.

Of course, forgotten by Remy and Rogue for the time being, the reason that they were at Jean's house was simple. They had come over earlier that night with the rest of the team (per Jean and Scott's invite) to have a barbeque. And when the older adults had left it had turned into a party. And when the party had started, the booze had started, and then the _fun _had started.

Remy's old team mate John was currently behind the couch and in a heavy (not to mention drunken) make-out session with Wanda, Kurt, who had only had one shot was teleporting away every few minutes only to bring back a random toilet seat, giggle uncontrollably, and then teleport away again. Kitty was twirling around the room, dancing to the loud music blasting from the stereo, though she hadn't had anything to drink at all.

Jean and Scott, who had had two shots each at least weren't freaking out at the havoc being caused in their home since the alcohol had managed to loosen them up, but at least they were still in control of their actions. Bobby, who couldn't remember how much he had had to drink, was busy creating ice sculptors on the front lawn, all of them shaped in the form of some graphic private parts. Usually this would be something that Jean would VERY MUCH care about, but right about now, she couldn't bring herself to care.

Tabitha had already passed out an hour ago and was lying facedown on the kitchen floor, snoring loudly. Everyone else had already left.

"Rogue!" Remy said suddenly as he made a grab for her hand. He missed of course, and after looking down in confusion, he realized that it hadn't been on the table where he thought it was. This was probably because she had moved it off of the table twenty minutes ago. "Where's your hand?" He asked, sounding genuinely worried.

Rogue lifted one shoulder as she dropped her head to look down at her lap. "I don't know…" she said slowly as she lifted her hands straight up in front of her face. "Oh wait…" she held her hands out for him to see. "Here they are!"

"Oh good," Remy mumbled and made a grab for them, but missed again anyway since he had aimed for the table again. This time his aim landed him on the remote control for Jean and Scott's TV, though at the moment, Remy mistakenly confused it for Rogue's hand and kissed it.

"Remy just had to say," Remy said as he rubbed the remote to his cheek affectionately, "That Remy loves you. Remy has for a looooong looooong loooooong time."

Rogue gasped in surprise and slapped both of her palms to her face and held them there. "Really?" She asked, and for some reason squished her cheeks together to make her mouth poke out. "Look at me, Remy," she giggled, "I look like the Blob."

"Then the Blob is hot," he stated as he nodded his appreciation. Suddenly he stopped and looked over at the remote next to his cheek. "What happened to your hand?"

"It got squashed," Rogue nodded as she dropped her hands into her lap again. "Bobby sat on it," she hiccupped.

"What!" Remy shouted, "Remy will kill him!"

He struggled to pull his legs out from under him in a sad attempt to stand, but the effort apparently was too much for him because he gave up after only trying for three seconds.

"Remy will try later," he grumbled. "No one hurts Remy's woman."

Obviously being drunk did nothing to stop Remy from talking about himself in the third person. _Obviously _it magnified that quirk in his personality.

"Whose you're woman?" Rogue demanded, slamming her palm down onto the table in a sudden fury. "I'll kill her!"

Remy blinked, yawned, and then scratched his chin. "What?"

Rogue stared for a moment, obviously haven already forgotten what they were talking about. "I don't know," she said finally as she looked down at her hand on the table. "Why does my hand hurt?"

"Because Kurt sat on it," Remy said.

"Kurt is blue," Rogue said matter-of-factly. "Kurt is my brother. Kurt has a tail."

Remy and Rogue both nodded as if this were all new and important information.

Kurt decided to teleport into the room at that moment, holding a very questionable looking toilet seat out proudly for them all to see. "I got this from the gas station," he told them with a big grin.

"Yay!" Rogue said loudly as she and Remy applauded.

Kurt dropped the seat in front of Jean's bookshelf before shuffling over to them and sitting next to Remy. "I like this stuff," he nodded, "I makes me feel all," he closed his eyes and lifted his arms above his head, swaying them slightly, "all…all…" And that was when he fell over backwards onto the carpet and snored loudly.

Remy looked over at Rogue in confusion. "Where did Kurt go? He stopped talking…"

"I dunno," Rogue started to look around again, searching for the tequila bottle. She spotted it—right in front of her—sitting on the table no less than a foot away. "I want some more of this good stuff," but as she reached out for the bottle, it was suddenly snatched away.

Rogue lifted her gaze up to Kitty, who stood over her, looking disapproving and clutching the bottle to her chest. "I think that's enough tequila for you guys tonight." She said easily, her eyes roving over their glazed over expressions with a mixture of worry and amusement.

"But I want it," Rogue argued, sounding very whiny.

"Give it to Remy's woman!" Remy demanded of Kitty, though he was staring at her stomach as he said it.

"No," Kitty said simply.

Rogue suddenly glared. "You. Bitch."

Kitty gaped, clearly appalled at the language that she had never come from Rogue. The aggressiveness, that was normal. But the language was not.

"Ok, that just sealed your fate!" Kitty said firmly as she swept off into the kitchen.

"No!" Remy and Rogue both attempted to stand—failed horribly—and then tried again.

It took three full minutes for them to remember how to stand, then they fell, tried to remember why they were getting up, got up again, and then attempted to remember how to walk. This consisted of a lot of stumbling, Remy tripping over Kurt, Rogue giggling for no reason, and a lot of gripping onto the wall and couch for support.

Of course, by the time they had managed to stand up and rush into the kitchen after Kitty (something that they forgot six times), Kitty herself had already finished hiding the bottle and was watching them with some amusement, her arms crossed over her chest and her lips smirking at them.

"Kitty!" Rogue finally stopped in front of her, dangerously swaying on her feet and pointing a finger in her general direction. "Where are you?" She asked accusingly.

Kitty lifted an eyebrow. "I'm right here in front of you Rogue. Remy! Remy drop that!"

Jean and Scott walked in as they heard Kitty's warning to find Remy standing next to the window and holding onto their wedding present that Professor X had gotten them, a crystal vase. Normally Jean would be freaking out and trying to stay calm, or would just simply use her power to pull it out of Remy's grip. But at the moment, the alcohol she had consumed was hindering her judgment on the situation, and she couldn't find it in her to care…much.

"Remy," Scott said calmly, clearly handling the tequila better than Jean was, "put down the vase, _slowly_."

"Hey Rogue!" Remy slurred happily, "look, I got a hat!" And he turned the vase upside down and placed it on his head…only to have it slip off and bust into a million pieces.

Jean screamed bloody murder, scaring the hell out of everyone in the room. But when Scott looked over at her quizzically, she shrugged.

"Sorry," she said sheepishly, "I felt like screaming…did I hear something break?"

Remy was staring down at the glass under his feet. "Oops," he said guiltily, "I broke your biscuit."

Kitty couldn't help bursting into quiet giggles, but Rogue, who seemingly didn't notice any of this going on around her, was still staring her down.

"I want my teki…tekslu…tekertella," Rogue stumbled over her words as her intoxicated mind tried to remember the name of what she had been drinking. "Tequiler…tequilo…hoppity hot spring…tequila!"

"No." Kitty told her sternly, "No more tequila for either of you tonight."

"Oh," Jean suddenly grabbed hold of her stomach. "I'm gonna be sick!" And she raced away off to the bathroom.

Sighing, Scott looked after her and then around the destroyed living room, littered with broken glass, various toilet seats, and what appeared to be two pairs of legs sticking out of behind his sofa. He knew that tomorrow morning Jean would have kittens when she saw the mess, not to mention the broken vase. This would probably be the last time that she would ever have the desire to hold another barbeque here, let alone invite any of their friends over.

Speaking of whom, Rogue was currently arguing with Kitty, wanting the alcohol back while Remy was unabashedly staring at her behind and leering. If he wasn't already worrying about what his wife would say tomorrow, Scott would have laughed. He almost did break into hysterics, mostly because he felt like he was going crazy, but managed to control himself.

"Kitty," he said tiredly as he rubbed a hand over his face, "Why don't you go help Jean? I'll take these two home and get them tucked in-"

"I'm not going anywhere with you!" Rogue said shrilly, cutting him off.

He turned his gaze to stare at her, wondering where the sudden hostility had come from. "What?"

"I won't-" Rogue blinked slowly at him as though she were trying to focus on his face more clearly-"go _anywhere_ until I get my tekerstell!"

Scott stared. "You're what?"

"Her tequila," Kitty sighed.

"That's right!" Rogue pointed a finger at Kitty.

"Roguueeee," Remy was suddenly behind her, wrapping his arms around her from behind and drawing her close. Scott and Kitty looked on as he stuck his nose into her hair and breathed deeply, a look of contentment on his face. "Rogue, you smell so good," he murmured into her hair, "you always smell like…like-"

"Tequila?" Kitty inquired but it went unnoticed by both Remy and Rogue.

"Jasmine," Remy finished before taking another long whiff.

He nuzzled her ear lovingly, causing Rogue to squirm in his grasp. "Remy, you're crazy, stop it, that tickles!"

"We need to get these two away from each other," Scott leaned closer to Kitty so that he could mutter in her ear. "And fast before they do anything they'll regret later on."

Kitty nodded in agreement as they both watched Remy continue to smell Rogue as though she were something to eat, and Rogue twisting in his grip and giggling at him to stop.

"Yeah, I agree," she said quietly, "but I don't think you can handle these two by yourself," she eyed them as she spoke, almost enjoying that Remy and Rogue seemed to happy together at the moment.

They had been dancing around their feelings for each other for weeks, ever since Remy had joined the team a month ago, and Kitty had known that they were bound to happen when Rogue had accomplished gaining control of her powers just a week ago. Though how she was managing to keep control in her current state, Kitty wasn't sure. Perhaps there was more to it than just concentrating (obviously) so Kitty didn't question it. As long as Remy wasn't writhing on the floor in agony, things were ok.

Well, except that they were both drunk out of their minds and seemed bent on getting frisky with each other, if the fact that they were now kissing each other hungrily was any indication to their thoughts.

"Oh, stop that!" She snapped at them, but they were in their own world now. She glanced over at Scott for help, but his cheeks were slightly pink and he seemed to be trying to ignore them. "Remy, Rogue!" She tried again but neither of them showed any sign that they had even heard her.

Remy's arms only tightened, and Kitty noticed that at some point (she wasn't sure when) that he had turned Rogue so that her body was pressed firmly against his. They were both clinging to each other tightly, refusing to acknowledge anything or anyone else around them, as there mouths and tongues battled with each other.

Kitty flushed too at this sight, suddenly feeling like she was looking at something that she REALLY shouldn't be looking at. This was probably true and she wished that Remy and Rogue had at least waited until she and Scott had left the room to engage in something so intimate.

"Ok," Scott said in a squeaky voice that Kitty had never heard from him before, "I'll get Remy, you get Rogue, and we'll drag them to the car and take them both back to their homes…" He left as Rogue let out a low moan into Remy's mouth, and blushing brightly, walked as fast as he could into the back of the house to check on Jean.

She was sitting on the floor next to the toilet in a lovely display of the negative affects of alcohol. She didn't protest as he lifted her and brought her to bed, just curled into his chest sleepily and murmured her thanks. After removing her shoes and tucking her in, Scott lightly kissed her forehead before exiting the room.

Next he went to check on the owners of the legs still sticking out of behind his couch, only to find both John and Wanda both gone.

"Where did the other two go?" He asked Kitty, who was looking more uncomfortable by the second as she tried to look anywhere but at the couple in front of her. She shrugged simply shrugged at him in response, causing him to worry. Hopefully neither of them had driven off in their current state.

He stopped to briefly pull a pillow off of the couch and place it under Kurt's head (who was still sprawled out on the floor) before heading back to help Kitty.

Somehow they managed to break the two apart. They tried several things, mostly bribes. Kitty wanted to just pry them apart but Scott knew too well that picking a fight with a drunk person was a stupid thing to do. Not to mention pulling a beautiful woman out of a drunk man's arms. Now _that_ was a stupid thing to do.

The thing that got them to separate—or to be more precise—the thing that got Rogue to stop and look at them hopefully, was Kitty promising more tequila. Of course, the word hopefully is used here in the loosest sense of the word. Rogue looked more faintly curious than she did hopeful, and seemed to be fighting the urge to meet Remy's lips again.

But after a great amount of coaxing and empty promises, Kitty had convinced the both of them that if they just came with her and Scott, that they could have as much tequila as they wanted.

So they both agreed to this, looking happy at the prospect of more drunkenness. Kitty and Scott both led them outside and to Scott's car, holding onto their hands and helping them when they stumbled, which was usually over their own two feet. Scott had just started to feel slightly relieved that this was going easier than he had initially thought that it would, when he noticed Bobby on the front lawn. Bobby, along with twenty or so ice sculptors of a woman's breasts and other genitalia, male and female alike.

The blood drained out of Scott's face as he watched, horrified, as Bobby put on the finishing touches of what appeared to be a giant butt, smack dab in the center of his front yard.

Jean was going to kill him.

And Scott was kind of scared not only of his wife's wrath, but of what the neighbors were going to think. Thankfully it was dark outside at the moment, so hopefully no one had seen any of this. And the hot summer night's air pressed in around them so Scott was pretty sure (or maybe he was just hoping too hard) that Bobby's creations would have melted by the morning or would have at least melted so much that they were indistinguishable.

But as much as a giant ice butt in the middle of his yard made him want to cry, Scott was even more worried when he noticed that the car John had driven in was gone. Wanda's was still parked in front of his mailbox but the pyromaniacs was no where to be seen. He wasn't exactly friends with either or them (in fact, the only reason that they had even been here was because Jean had held the barbeque to 'bring the teams together') but he still hoped that they were ok and hadn't driven off into a ditch somewhere.

"Bobby!" he called as he helped Remy into the backseat. "Bobby, come get in the car, I'll take you home!"

Bobby snapped his gaze up from concentrating on his sculptor and met Scott's eyes. He looked incredibly guilty, but he also looked like he enjoyed feeling guilty at the same time. He grinned mischievously, and giggling like an enrage lunatic, he threw caution to the wind and wildly ran into the house, slamming the door behind him.

Scott sighed tiredly again. "I thought I locked that," he murmured before checking that Remy and Rogue were both in the backseat. After asking Kitty to hold on for a moment, he went in to find Bobby giggling behind his couch.

He _knew_ it was a bad idea, but Scott was beginning to get irritated with the whole situation. He fervently hoped that he could drop Remy and Rogue at their homes quickly enough to get back home before it was completely encased in ice. These were both reasons that he left Bobby there, giggling like a madman and walked out the door, making sure to double lock it on his way out.

"I'm never letting Jean have another barbeque," he told Kitty after he had climbed into the car and started backing out of the driveway. He glanced in his rearview mirror, only to be met with the sight of Remy and Rogue once again in a passionate lip lock. "Have they been doing that the whole time?" He asked, uneasy about how he was going to have to pry them apart a second time.

"Yes," Kitty answered, sounding irritated.

"You ok?" He asked her, sparing a glance in her direction as he started the drive back to Remy's apartment.

"I'm fine," she replied, sending him a little smile. "It's just kind of uncomfortable sitting with those two while they grope each other."

"Hey!" Remy slurred at her, "I'm not groping! This is a—a—a…" He trailed off, seemingly forgetting what he had wanted to say. "A…an art!" He finished, sounding pleased with himself, "it's the art of love."

Despite his current mood, Scott snorted over the steering wheel at hearing his words.

"I think you mean the art of _lust_," Kitty corrected him cheekily.

"No," Remy argued and he tightened his arms around Rogue, "I love her," he said quietly as he gazed down at the woman in his arms.

Suddenly Kitty felt like she was looking at something she shouldn't all over again. Obviously Scott felt the same as he firmly kept his eyes on the road and his hands on the steering wheel tightened just the tiniest bit.

"You're silly Remy," Rogue said teasingly from the backseat, "but I love you too."

Kitty and Scott both let out a tense breath at the same time, both of them wishing they were somewhere other than _there_ at that moment. If Rogue and Remy ever found out what they had witnessed them both saying (both of them saying things that they had never even said to each other) these things, they would most probably be very embarrassed.

Scott vainly attempted to block out their voices as he turned the car onto a busier street of downtown Bayville. Glancing at the clock he saw that it was only ten and there were still a good number of people milling about.

But no matter how hard he concentrated on driving or the people outside, he could still hear Remy behind him chuckling. "Well I love you more," he teased lightly.

"No you don't!" Rogue argued, sounding much more serious than Remy did. "I love you more!"

"Keep telling yourself that, chère. But Remy loves you more than he's ever loved anyone else."

Rogue made a noise as though she were growing more annoyed and wanted to argue more, but suddenly she gasped and Scott glanced in the rear view mirror to see that Remy had started kissing her hungrily again. He looked away quickly and it was a good thing too since he had almost run the red light.

He pulled to a stop and sighed, silently wondering how he and Kitty were going to manage to separate Remy and Rogue and leave them at their respective homes. They were clinging to each other so heatedly in his backseat, that he was sure he was going to be in for a big fight.

Maybe he could blast both of them with his eyes—just enough to knock them out…

"Scott, SCOTT!" Kitty was yelling at him frantically, pulling him out of his thoughts.

"What, what?" He asked in alarm.

But to his surprise, Kitty was jumping out of the car quickly and threw over her shoulder before she shut the door-"Remy and Rogue!"

Scott blinked and looked into the backseat to find it empty. HOW he had missed this, he wasn't sure. Obviously his thoughts had drifted him farther away than he had thought, and combined with his sleepiness and the small amount of alcohol he had consumed, he supposed that that might have been enough to make him forget his surroundings.

Speaking of his surroundings, his was still at the stop light which was now green. Several cars behind him were blowing their horns angrily, but he ignored them and tried to see exactly where Kitty had run off to.

A little ways away, Rogue and Remy slipped into the closest building they could manage. They both giggled uncontrollably, red faced and falling over each other. They hoped that they had been able to escape Kitty. They both had a sneaking suspicion that she didn't have any more tequila like she had promised and they were bound and determined to have _some_ fun tonight.

It had been surprisingly easy to slip unnoticed out of the car. This might have been because Kitty had been embarrassed by their passion and had covered her ears to block out the noise, while Scott had seemed to be on another planet. They had gotten quite a ways before Kitty had noticed them (or at least that was what their intoxicated minds barely registered as they escaped) and had gotten several buildings down away from where the car was still sitting.

Suddenly, Remy gasped and grasped her around her waist, drawing her closer to his side. "Rogue, look," he brought a hand under her chin to tilt her face up.

Rogue looked around to see what building they had come into. But all she really registered was white—a lot of white. And something frilly that looked like…oh wait, those were flowers.

"Hello!" A blonde woman sitting behind a desk decorated in more the flowers and an insane amount of tulle welcomed them. "How may I help you two?"

Remy grinned down at Rogue and though she had no idea what he was grinning about, returned his look with a silly smile.

"Rogue," he slurred happily, "I think we should let her help us."

Rogue gasped and then smiled brightly as though this were the best idea she had ever heard. "Ok!"

They both stumbled forward, knocking over a stack of papers on a little table on their way, and nearly tripping three times before they finally made it to the desk. Either the woman behind it somehow didn't notice that they were drunk or didn't care. The answer to this was probably the latter.

"Ok, help us now," Remy said to her once they had stopped in front of her desk, leaning heavily on each other and nearly falling over.

"Um," she pursed her lips as she studied them before smiling politely, "What exactly would you like help with? Do you want to get married?"

If he were any less drunk, Remy would have rolled his eyes, but since he wasn't in his right mind, he rolled his whole head around instead before whipping it back around to stare at her. "Well this _is_ a wedding chapel," he said.

"What!" Rogue gasped, "Whose getting married?"

"Me," Remy answered her while he continued to stare at the blonde woman expectantly.

"You?" Rogue questioned, sounding very upset at this news. "Who are you gonna marry?"

Remy finally turned to gaze down at her. He plucked her nose as he grinned. "You, silly."

"Really?" Rogue grinned goofily before giggling. "Ok, then."

Outside on the dark sidewalk, Kitty was beginning to grow more worried by the second. Not only because her friends were no where to be seen, but because she was alone and she was getting a few lingering looks from strange men. She suddenly wished that she had waited for Scott, or hadn't covered her ears and been more concentrated on what Remy and Rogue had been doing.

She had looked through a few other buildings, going all through them to make absolutely sure that they weren't in there, and she was seriously starting to contemplate on calling Logan or Professor X for help. But if she could help it, she didn't want to drag more people into this.

"Kitty!"

Kitty sighed in relief as she heard Scott calling her and stopped to wait for him to catch up.

"Have you found them?" He asked, sounding concerned.

Having already grown agitated by the whole situation, she glared at him. "Yes, Scott, I did find them, but I decided to let them go," she snapped. "I've always been against keeping wild animals caged up, you know that."

Scott looked like he didn't know whether to laugh or cry.

"Have you looked in here?" He finally gestured to the building they had both stopped in front of.

Kitty glanced up at the sign in the window without any real interest…until she saw what it said. Scott had seen it at the same time, and they both jerked their heads in the other's direction, their eyes locking and widening in horror.

"You don't think…" Kitty trailed off.

"I think," Scott said before he dived for the door and ran in, Kitty right behind him.

They immediately were covered in a shower of white rice and rose petals. Their hearts stopped at the sight of Rogue and Remy, their arms linked and walking—or stumbling—down a little isle and laughing hysterically. There was a man holding a little book behind them, and a blonde woman by the door throwing the rice and petals on them, both smiling as though this were the best day ever.

"What _happened_?" Kitty asked to no one in particular, sounding distressed.

"They got married!" The woman throwing the rice and petals informed them with a smile.

Scott, still gaping at the scene before him, managed one question through his shock. "How…what…is this even _legal_?"

"Oh yes," the woman sounded very proud as she said this, "this is _perfectly_ legal!"

"I didn't even know we had one of these in Bayville," Kitty said weakly as Rogue and Remy fell over each other, laughing.

"Would you like to take pictures?" The blonde woman asked brightly and stopped throwing things to shove a disposable camera in her hands.

Kitty stared down at it blankly for a moment before sighing in defeat. "Oh…Oh fine, whatever," she grumbled and started snapping pictures.

As Rogue and Remy noticed the picture taking, and started getting into insane poses, Scott groaned and slapped a hand to his face, slowly trailing it down, suddenly feeling a thousand times more tired than he had a few moments before. He tried not to think about what Rogue and Remy would say tomorrow. He tried to think of different stories that he could tell them—none of them including himself—that wouldn't make him seem at fault for any of this.

"Ok driver!" Remy said to Scott when Kitty had run out of film. "Take us the honeymoon suite."

Scott's eyes widened as he realized what Remy now wanted him to do. Really, what else could he do? He could always call for help, though the thought of anyone finding out that he and Kitty had been partially responsible for letting Rogue and Remy get married in their condition was not something that he wished for. So that idea was out. They could always try to lure them in separate directions with bribes of more tequila but as Scott looked at the now married couple he figured that _that_ ending in their favor was highly improbable. And he couldn't just leave them here and run for the hills, they would end up walking into the street and killing themselves.

He sighed for what seemed like the hundredth time that night. There was only one thing that he could try, but he doubted that it would work. All he had to do…was drive Remy to his apartment, wrestle him away from Rogue and tie him to a chair. Scott almost groaned at that idea. But it was all he had left.

"Alright," he said wearily, causing Kitty to look at him like he was crazy. "Come on, you two."

Kitty and Scott walked on either side of the married couple, gripping their elbows and steering them to where Scott had parked the car. They got a few strange looks on the way, mostly because Remy kept screaming, 'I got married' and Rogue kept screaming 'I want an ice cream sandwich'.

They made sure that the back doors were securely locked this time before driving off.

"Are we really going to just let them...you know?" Kitty asked quietly once they were driving again.

"I have a plan," Scott muttered. In reality he was growing more and more to where he didn't really care. He was sure that there was no way his weak plan was going to work.

In the backseat, Rogue was sighing dreamily as Remy kissed his way down her jaw line and over her neck, stopping to lightly nibble on her pulse point. She gasped in pleasure and Kitty had to fight the urge to not cover her ears again.

That was pretty much the whole ride to Remy's apartment—Kitty trying to distract herself by singing the national anthem backwards in her head, Scott was starting to care less and less what Remy and Rogue did with their own time, and Remy and Rogue themselves in an uninhibited and heated make out session.

When they pulled up in front of Remy's door, Scott dropped his head on the steering wheel and fought not to whimper sadly as he heard Remy's next words.

"You're Remy's now, mon chère," he purred as he opened his door.

"Aren't we going to stop them?" Kitty asked Scott, sounding as reluctant as he felt about the whole situation.

Scott lifted his head to look out of the windshield, at Rogue and Remy who were stumbling towards the door, kissing each other hurriedly, and fumbling with the keys all at once.

"We_ really_ should," he sighed and opened his door, stepping out into the hot night air.

He started for Remy and Rogue with Kitty at his side, but they both stopped dead in their tracks at the sight of Remy pulling (and very nearly ripping) Rogue's shirt off of her body. He fumbled behind him and somehow managed to open the door, dragging her inside and slamming it closed behind them.

This had all happened so fast that Kitty and Scott stood dumbfounded, staring at the door to Remy's apartment. They should _really _and stop things now before they got too out of hand, and they both knew it, but for some reason or the other, the thought of ripping two naked drunk people apart was not an appealing one. Sure Rogue would probably be mad at them for letting it happen in the morning…if she found out that they had been here, of course.

Scott and Kitty turned and stared at each other for a long moment, silently agreeing with just the look in their eyes that no one would ever find out they had been here. There was no need to tell anyone anyway, right? Right?

…RIGHT?


End file.
